the love hate hero

i quit my job.so im now jobless and job hunting.
i like jobs.they keep me occupied.
coz right now i am in a yellow top and red boy shorts(sorry my fashion sense is horrible) watching roswell reruns on the net(yes, i have horrible taste)

i just came back from the dentist.i waited almost 20 minutes but i was in the office for less than two minutes.it went like this

me:urm, doctor, i think my wisdom tooth is growing and i dont have space in my mouth.

doctor: here, lemme check.owh, your wisdom tooth is growing the wrong way thast why it hurts.you have to do a minor operation to take it out.we might have to cut a bit of your bones and gums.dont worry it will grow back.the operation  will last abt half an hour to an hour and it will cost you abt rm300-700.

me:so what am i supposed to do now?

doctor:i’ll give u some painkillers.

me:err, kay.

thats how it went.i chew like a grandma now.it hurts sooo much.all i eat is porridge.

and my mums laptop is still taken hostage in my room.
yesterday was my last day at parkson.no going away party..but k.abby and k.anis gave me a pair of earrings and a bracelet which i was so touched.i barely knew them for two months!!

family is friends that you just get, while friends are family that you get to choose.

ever heard of that saying?well, now i live by it.i mean, i think my friends are totally AWESOME.and i thank God everyday for granting me these set of friends that i would live and die with.

my parkson friends were a bit weird the first few days when i started to work coz there were a lot of friends coming down to visit me.and im so touched my the gesture.

so lemme just say it friends, i love you guys *tear*

and this time is on the beautifool discoveries that ive made in the net tonight.(damn, i love it when i get to get off from work early)

ok, u know how obsessed i am with roswell?not the roswell area 51 aliens abducting shizzle, but the series, roswell, aired circa 2001, and ended after 3 seasons?

well, i really really like the  second couple in the show, michael and maria, and apparently the maria (played by majandra delfino) did a duet with this french singer called princess robert and the song is so haunting.its like a nice lullaby in french, its called le prince bleu d’arthelis.and its abt how a prince become gloomy and etc (i idnt get the whole lyrics actually)

then i was so bored i went into myspace tv and found out about this short series called quarterlife.its abt this girl dylan who blogs abt her friends in this website called quarterlife.and its so raw and cool.and i actually discovered it coz i was searching some stuff abt majandra delfino.and she had a cameo in there.

yeah, dats what i do when im bored and while waiting for my gossip girl to finish download so i can watch it.
but hey, from boredom bred curiousity and from curiousity comes discovery and then success.i sound like a fucked up motivator.

i saw the obriens guy again today,but its hard to make someone u like to notice u when u dont even know each other exists.life sucks that way

i hate anticipation.
i hate waiting for that dreaded day that everyone around me just wants to get over with
im afraid that things wont go according to what i plan
i hate waiting for those results.
last time when it was pmr, i spend the whole day before the results came out at klcc watching king kong and shopping.
that means 3 hours of giant gorilla(excluding black jack), 2 hours of mindless browsing, and one hour of lunchtime.that totals to 6 hours, plus my 12 hour sleep,it wasnt much of a wait at all.
but God, please dear dear God, please grant me those As that i have slavishly work for the past 2-wait, 5 years of my life.

urghhhhh.hate anticipation.

i learned this past week that there is no one that you can rely on.no one you can trust.
last year i was beginning to open up my heart and actually reflect what i felt in my heart with actions, but these past events showed me bottling up and keeping your feelings shut down all the time.
build a stone wall around you.dont ever ever let anyone break it down.
never trust anyone.
the foundations of a family is a fucking lie.
i never felt that sort of hurt and pain ever in my life before.
im not telling all of you what happened, but these are the consequences.
one of it is i am never ever ever going to ampang again.never.
as for them, and if u are reading this, u know who u are, you can just go to hell

today i learned a verrryy valuable lesson.
never trust your fucking family.
they are just like the lot of ‘em.
fuck ‘em all

i never thought a look on someone face can really brak your heart in shattered pieces.

yeap.got my pay last week.first thing i did was topup my phone.

today i bought this cool charm bracelet that i’v been eyeing for a looong time.it costs something like 18.90 i think.i just wasnt sure if i wanted it or not.but i bought it anyway, coz its the only cheap charmbracelet with lots of charms on it (peonies,starfish,cupid, glass heart, a key, a carved leaf).

if only i have a sugadaddy dat can buy me a thomas sabo full of charms.i’d never leave his side=)

work was okay.wendy wu gave us some oranges,i talk a lot with k.abby. its funny that the last person i clicked with would be k.abby.but seriously, she is one cool chica.she teach lots and always tell u how the how to’s in a nice way.

btw,i think i’ll be spending a loy on jewellry this month.blame sarowzski.they’re having s staff only sale at CRAZZZZY prices.i’d be bloody mad if i dont buy it!

i found the lost item presumed "stolen" in the shop today.apparently someone puts it at another shelf.

btw, i like the way the body shop’s aqua lily smell.its so nice!

so,im quite unkown in the world of seniors in kys.but considering there is 667 members of the KYS alumni, i dont mind that much.i mean, getting to see all the old seniors(from 97-06) was good enough.like to see how THEY made it outside and carry on with their lives while some ppl are still grasping the fact that they’re out of high school.in other words..KYSER WEEKEND WAS AWESOME!

kyser weekend was super duper fun.not only did i get to meet my euphoria mates that i miss oh-so-much.i also get to see my lil adek-adek still stuck in jail like deena,nael,sara,chix,& saylem(those not mention are NOT forgotten,ok?).and also the teachers, though i didnt get to see them much except for a few.

i kinda enjoyed the activities there, but only in a third perspective kinda view(a.k.a spectator,penyangak,non-participant,supporter)its cool that we could mingle with people who are complete strangers and not even knowing their names, just cause we share the same bond.

first,icebreaking.and it hit me that time realizing that i really missed how kys is, especially when ppl come up and say hi,and all the hows yous.and it felt great to be lepaking with friends i havent seen in a long time.then there was AGM.gosh, i didnt knew that that reunion could eat up our pockets.and when i learned that some of my abangs and kakas of kys donated a lot to actually fund the whole thing,i really1000x began appreciating their hard work on evrything.

that nite, makan nite!gosh, i havent eaten kys food in a looong time.i even said to alya ‘is it me or the food is GOOD?’(but later i found out that all the food was pre-ordered..hampa hati)but i ate.A LOT.

abg nadzry said we were free to do anything that nite, so i was planning for that long awaited nitewalk.heck,evrytime i wanna do something cool it always rains.so the nitewalk ended before it even begun(another hampa)we ended up just lepaking and taking a gazillion photos with eye blinding flashes at the amphitheatre.

and i still dont feel guilty later that nite(or a.m) when we went out for kfc at 2.am.and yeah i didnt have breakfast the next day coz the food is still digesting in our bellies by the time we slept.

the part that sucks is that i forgot to bring extra t-shirts and a pair of sneakers.and alos sweatpants.so what was suppose to look like sports attire had to be improvised into something that resembled an outfit for strolling in the park.

and thats another reason why the non-participation thing was going on.how can u play games when ure wearing shoes that would slip off?

all in all, kyser weekend was a major blast from the past.and if next year would be something ectraordinary like this,then i wouldnt miss it for the world=)

ps..a lil SHOUT OUT to my gorgeous friend LISA AMANI LAWA(dah puas hati?) for lettin me hitch a ride and AFIQ RAZIN for being a pain in the **s.ciao baby!

im working for a month now.my job sucks but thats all that i can do.
my brain is rusty and my englsih is rusty and i speak malay in that chinese chokia accent.just grreat

btw, i just received a call from khazanah scholarship awards.i’ve been called for an interview next tuesday.yup, lets hear it, yeay!

but i dunno how the heck ms. lai could hand in my name?like, im not even top ten in my class,man.and there are other smarty pants apart from me.its not that im not thankful, im just super curious.

btw, im soooo in angauness over that hot obrien’s guy.heck, i dont even know his friggin’ name.but who cares when u trudge thru klcc in the morning and he puffed out his cheek and smiled at you?*swoon*=Dokay, i need to meet real people and seriously stop talking to fictional characters in my head.

im not crazy,i swear.im just barking mad!

i pick a fight with that bitch ah fan today.she was absolutely RUDE.so i shouted at her.

i am in LURRRVVVEEE with that guy from o’briens.wait, scratch that.its just an infatuation.but he’s gorgeous.

celest sucks.period.so much for super cool manager